Sore heads, but wonderful memories, the squad disbanded today after yesterday's fantastic Test match victory. We were obviously meant to win the game and square the series because today it has rained all day. Sitting at breakfast this morning, the black clouds unleashed a storm of rain that would have kept the Brisbane rain gods happy for a year. Beautiful Antigua, with its heavenly blue skies and hot dry suns, is looking more like England at this time of the year than the island paradise for which it is renowned. I feel a little sorry for those English tourists who arrived here today, for an escape from the cold UK weather, only to be treated to the same conditions.

Although it is sad when the tour comes to an end, it has become accepted among the playing fraternity that the Test team and one-day team are now seen as separate entities. When the bus drew away from the hotel at 4pm, carrying the guys who will play in this one-day series and the World Cup, it quickly dawned upon those of us left standing in the hotel foyer, that this 1999 West Indies tour was over.

There have been many memorable moments during the past seven weeks and as I sit here on the hotel balcony I have a perfect chance to reflect upon this tour and series. The first Test victory in Trinidad, where Glenn McGrath and Jason Gillespie humbled the West Indies for 51 was a fantastic day for the good guys, with the celebration rivaling the biggest ever. Although it was an awesome effort and an exhilarating feeling, looking back, that victory may have acted as a catalyst for our poorer showings in the second and third Test matches. Perhaps we became a little complacent as a result of the spirit of invincibility that had been built up by the media and maybe even within the team.

Complacency is a cardinal sin, especially when the opposition hosts three great players and a visible improvement in team spirit and morale. The West Indies must be commended for the way they kept their heads up after the first Test and kept working hard towards improvement. While we also continued to work hard I feel we probably lost some of the edge, some of the sharpness, required to dominate top-line sport.

The second Test in Jamaica was the first sign of the changing in momentum. Brian Lara played his first sensational innings for the series as we were left wicketless for the whole day. It must have been a very long time since the Australian cricket team has gone a full day's play without once joining in the team huddle after a fallen wicket. Our long tough day in the field was followed by a mediocre second innings batting display where Ambrose and Walsh showed, once again, why they are world-class performers. One-all in the series, and even though the cricket world were shocked by the change in fortunes, the West Indies were beginning to look more formidable with talk of Hooper and Chanderpaul returning for the final two Tests.

Hooper returned for the Barbados Test and at stumps on day two it looked as though Viv Richards, Clive Lloyd and Gordon Greenidge could also have made a comeback and we would still win the test. Wrong again, as we were bundled out cheaply in our second innings, giving Lara and his team a sniff of a very unlikely victory. In the circumstances this was possibly Brian Lara's best innings for the series as he guided his team to a remarkable victory and a 2-1 lead in the series.

While there was never any panic within our team, we all knew that a special effort was needed in this final Test in Antigua. Back-to-back Test matches are very hard going, but we all urged each other to find something extra to retain the Frank Worrell trophy. Geoff Marsh worked us very hard before the Test, and both he and 'Tugga' pleaded for a much better effort from the batsmen. Warney was left out of the team, bigger news than the death of Phar Lap (maybe not that big, but you get the idea), and Mark Waugh was named vice-captain for the game. There was tension before the match as we were desperately determined to make amends for letting ourselves down in the second and third Tests, but I also had the feeling that we were ready for one last fight.

The result has been well documented and it was with great pleasure that the team handed over the trophy to the safe hands of Malcolm Speed and Dennis Rogers after the game. Although the series hadn't been dominated like we may have expected, all four Test matches produced many magical moments. As I have said so many times this series, Glenn McGrath and new skipper Stephen Waugh were simply outstanding players. 'Tugga' not only batted like the master that he is, but he also captained the team with strength and inspiration. He is a very focused man and his team meetings and words of wisdom were always carefully planned and prepared. He did an excellent job for his first tour as Australian captain.

Brian Lara was also brilliant with the bat and obviously inspirational to his team-mates, who fought back as only you would expect proud but wounded soldiers. Courtney Ambrose and Courtney Walsh are magnificent bowlers and I have to admit I am very happy that I don't have to lock horns with these guys for at least another two years. They are hard work, nothing more, nothing less.

Off the field, this tour was the most hectic I have been on, with little time spent away from cricket grounds. We have played seven games in seven weeks, good practice for another season of county cricket. My visit to Trenchtown in Jamaica was the highlight of the tour off the park, although my comet adventure was something else. The West Indies is a wonderful place to tour. The people are laid back, the beaches white and inviting, the palm trees an instant relaxant, the music loud, the dancers fluid, the rum smooth, the cricket draining.

I am off to London tomorrow to play for Middlesex. It seems unreal that on Tuesday I will be padding up at Lords in two cricket sweaters, long sleeve shirts and hand warming pads. While I am looking forward to renewing friendships in London I think it is going to take a little time to recover from this series. It has been a blast and I am thrilled that I have been a part of it.

I will see you from the outside looking in during the one-dayers.

From Antigua, JL